The last thing I'm looking for is Marie Kondo cluttering up my life

By The Newsroom
Published 14th Jan 2019, 06:16 BST
Updated 16th Jan 2019, 19:33 BST
Blaise need no help locating his half-chewed birosBlaise need no help locating his half-chewed biros
Blaise need no help locating his half-chewed biros
I am delighted to report that, half way into January, my year has begun largely how the last one finished - in a flurry of baked produce consumption, alongside the odd glass or two of booze.

In keeping with my tendency to ignore all fads, I have, once again, shunned Dry January and have absolutely turned my back on Veganuary. Of course, I have made some efforts to lessen my girth and do up my top button and, so far this year, I have yet to consume anything in batter nor have I so much as looked at a bag of chips since before Jools Holland's Hootenanny.

I have, however, nearly finished the bumper box of pork scratchings that my wife’s sibling bought me for my birthday the other week. If Carlsberg did brother-in-laws…..

Hide Ad
Hide Ad

While I can happily go a week (well Sunday night to 6pm on a Friday), without alcohol passing my lips, the idea of enduring the dullest of months without the aid of anything stronger than Tizer leaves me cold.